By: Kristin Peterson (1/7/23)

Today, as I made further progress on purging my “possessions,” an endeavor that one could consider has taken a lifetime, I sat on my bed, closed my eyes, and wondered about attending a meditation retreat (if I could possibly find one that allows the patron to attend for free or in work/ energy exchange). I closed my eyes and imagined them asking everyone, “What is the purpose of a bloom?” While most answered then and there, I waited for all to leave. Then I asked, “To know this, I would have to know the intent behind your question.” They replied, “To understand your first/ intuitive impression” or something like that. Because before I knew their intent, my first thought was to contemplate the question over the course of the retreat, meditate, think, pray, imagine, draw, think of its lifestyle in the scientific and metaphysical world, and all these wonderful ways one could contemplate a single, symbolic question at a spiritual level and then get it down to one like hella cool, savvy, Buddhist level sounding reply in one, power packed statement. But as you can see, I’m not yet given to talking in short structures. Different plants, different personalities, I guess. Well, once the relief of knowing that the reply being asked was one of immediate, off the top of your Head/Heart thinking (and side note: I am intentional about my word choice here on “reply” not “answer,” because, who am I to know infinite Truths and a reminder to remain open to the Possibilities) I replied something like, “Oh, well then that’s easier.” But wouldn’t one have to first ask about the condition of the initial seed, the love with which it was nestled into the earth, and consider the lifespan of the flower itself? A bloom is a product that originates from a seed first. That seed must be planted and receive the basic tenets of Nurturing, Space (for it to continue to grow in an ever Expansive world, also allowing Change), Time (which we believe measurable, and to some extent it is, but by whose distribution of exchange and limit), Light (the sunshine reflecting the Spiritual Flame within), Nourishment (or, in this case, rehydration and the redistribution of the elements), and finally: Love. Rather than asking of the purpose of a bloom, we should ask of its roots. The conditions in which it grew. The Nature or Nurture of the situation. Whether all variables were distributed in equal measure. There are so many stages of development before the bloom, that to jump to the beauty or comparison of beauty, as if the blossom were the sole purpose of flowers, could somewhat invalidate the process of its Journey to its Essential Lesson for us: That the purpose of a blossom is to show the world the beauty of opening up and revealing itself, of letting go and accepting the process with the faith that we, like flowers, are guaranteed to bloom, but only in our natural Space and Time, and with the active search for and acceptance of Light, Nourishment, and Love.

Nature is reflective of nature, our natures, for it is no mistake that these under-analyzed homonyms define our world, in both positive and negative light. Nevertheless, to circle back to the imaginary (or from the Ethers/ Source Vision) of the Holy Being’s question… maybe the purpose of the bloom is to show that every part of its life cycle, from the pollination process to the planting of the seed, to the nourishment (or lack of) and growth therein, was needed to move from survival (what I do to Control) to surrender (what I do to Release). I pray that whatever season you are in, that you, too, focus not on the comparison of blooms by appearance, distribution of growth, or other fears comparison brings to our Psyche, both as an Individual and as a Whole. One person’s thoughts are like a ripple on a pond, then connected to maybe a river then distributed to a channel (heh), and then hits the vast ocean and who knows from there! Shoot, Daaaang! There’s SO much we don’t know about what’s going on down there! Who’s to say what happens next after water gets to the ocean, but I get salty about not knowing sometimes… Get it? Ocean. Salty. (I got it like that.) Anyways, my beauties, I return to pray and see in my Sight the healing of humanity and a bouquet of blossoms called Change, Acceptance, Surrender, Faith in the Process, Humility, Laughter, Love, Helpfulness, Mindfulness, and Spunk just to name a few! There’s a whole garden out there waiting for us to nourish and grow! Together! As One! If you see a fellow bloom, you don’t say, “Oh, I don’t like Daffodils! I’m not going to water that one because, eh… they’re not my favorite…” or, “I prefer Bushes… I’ll let this Mushroom die… If I give all my attention to the Bushes, it’s okay if I ignore the Mushrooms altogether, Right? Who cares if they help decompose and bring life through their transmutation of nutrients and elements… Mushrooms are just… not my ‘Thing’…” Sounds a bit… almost socially and spiritually irresponsible at this point, don’t you think? To neglect half of an entire population because… “Eh…”?

Just yesterday, I was sharing a contemplation with my friend Jessica about the act of over explaining or oversharing oneself to another, or in other words, for those who struggle a little bit (or a Lotta’ bit) with codependency, the need to people please and think that if they only knew where I’m coming from and every single detail in my mind, then maybe I would be Seen. Maybe if I had more time with them, I’ll prove how worthy I am of their attention, when, sister/brother/other: THEY JUST ASKED YOU OUT! They’re interested, okay! And you SO deserve that! It’s That. Basic. They. Pursue. You. You don’t need Time here, friend. You need to “Light”-en up and just be present and Nourish. Get rid of those yearnings of completion and validation through others… “If I _________ with *insert person’s name*, then maybe they/ she/ he would *insert “complete me”*, a completely toxic yet TOTALLY UNDERSTANDABLE role we play out until we learn that lesson… Wow, that one sucks, huh?! Sorry you also have known that pain. That, “…Maybe then I would feel Accepted… maybe then I’d be Understood… maybe then I’d be Validated in my actions, words or deeds… maybe then I wouldn’t be neglected… maybe then I wouldn’t be misunderstood… maybe then my trauma would be magically healed, who knows… (but I know for sure it doesn’t work like that…) Just longing for a Moment, to feel Loved, to feel Accepted, to feel Cherished. Like I deserve. (Which inevitably seems a fleeting sentiment if put entirely into the hands of another rather than self.) But did you notice the crux here? Me. Me. Me. Ever the Wounded until I reframe to be the Healer. Until then, projecting past insecurities in bumbly jumbly form to someone who quite frankly has nothing to do with it and honestly, probably just wants to be chill and Still, you know? Like: Honestly. Instead, I want to reprogram my brain and reactions, even if taking mindful moments after you’ve just caught yourself saying something that is of old mind and then shaking your head and being like, “I’m so sorry, I don’t think that, I don’t know where that came from,” or just throwing some sort of proverbial bone to those loved ones, the others, to let them know, “Hey, I am also societally and familially and culturally conditioned, maybe religiously and other notions as well, but hey! I See it, I Heard it, and I’m Working on it.” I mean, if I saw someone at least trying to better themselves, isn’t that really actually strikingly and achingly beautiful, that they strive through the pain to improve for Your benefit (and obviously primarily their own as well, don’t get me wrong…)? That they SURVIVED, whatever traumas and deep tears in mental, physical, and spiritual flesh, through childhood, through youth, through further youth, through further youth as every year passes and every year before seems so far away in leaps of learning as you See more and Know more and Experience more… they went through ALL THAT: just so that they could be Here, today, for You, in mutual understanding and compassion. Just like YOU deserve. Wow… Now THAT is Moving. Do you see that Shift in thinking? How if we DID the things we wanted our partner to do, in a *healthy* relationship, it would inspire reciprosity which gets you exactly what you wanted in the first place. It’s that idea that you get what you give! You see what you want to see! Mind you, I agree with my friend, Stephanie, that we need not build lofty thrones of worship for any one person, but rather build pillars through family, friends, soul work, worship, fun and other to lend Balance to the one additional pillar of a romantic relationship, ALL of which support our Structure and hopefully equally, thus ensuring that the romantic attachment partner doesn’t have to bear too heavy a load. In other words: Don’t take them for… Granite? Heh! Anyways, It’s mind blowing how self-love just enhances all gifts, including the consideration of others, and if I am just polite, conscientious, showing interest and just letting loose in the moment… I’m gonna’ be just about the sexiest thing ’round wherever I roam, if given the right level of attraction, desire and with-it-ness to look them in the eye and be like, “You- Me- Yup. We’re doing this.” So see?! The gift keeps on giving! Selflessness is not only the Spiritual path, but the Sexy one too! When all is said and done, past the grandeur of Ego I had just then talking myself up, something we all should do from time to time, builds the confidence a bit, there… but here we go: I want to be open-hearted, brave, and let love shine through my entire being, for my family, for my friends, for my Purpose, for animals, for Nature, for others, and if I’m really honest, especially for any potential Lover along the path. And to take less of the Space for to prioritize their growth, their health, and their best life… and to watch for Reciprocation of mutual Connection or else close the Connection for the time being and let it be until the natural flow returns again… kind of like a river that trickles through Winter and rushes in the Spring… well, maybe when Spring manifests: There you go, Tiger! So isn’t it best to just be Present and in the Moment, not lost in potential in your Head, and just instead choose to develop healthy habits and strengthen that Spiritual Savviness? And to what? Let things happen: Organically… And so, every day, I let go and let God (/Source) and do me until I can love myself enough to learn about and practice and make calls and volunteer and query about and all the things to help others. That way, when my person comes along, I’ll be Spiritually buff as Yoda or something… or Deanna Troi… yeah… that’ll do… (Imzadi anyone? You know what I’m talking about! All… 2-4 of you… Okaaaay?!? *Triple finger snap*)

BACK to the subject! Really, when you think about it, sometimes words of excuse or seeking validation are often measured by the mettle of both the Mentor and the Student. If we do not love ourselves, if we lack any of our genetic and environmental (including the elements and vibrations within, sonosance included) necessities, such as Space, Time, and the search for and acceptance of Light, Nourishment, and Love, here is what could happen: We may authentically explain what our intentions are, seeing ourselves in either the most or least charitable light, depending on the frame of duality of Ego, but the question is: Do we know ourselves well enough to even connect to our own intention, or are we possibly so Emotionally Dishonest that we are either unable or unwilling to see what it is that we are truly doing? As in, do WE even truly know why we did something or what effect you Intended versus what Impact it had on reality? When my friend Jessica was listening (and thank you for the act of truly hearing what I was saying silently without interruption until completion of dissertation basically), she was helping me see my own tendency to require validation from others to booster my value (which, I remind myself, “I Know, I Know…” should be coming from myself to Myself rather than from any other source, minus the Source, of course… well didn’t that sound like Mr. Ed?! How equestrian from a Centaur here!)… Well, anyways, Jessica gave me this gem, just the cutest little metaphor, I could barely contain myself! Oh, the pleasure of a good Nature metaphor (or simile? I don’t know, but sure smile anyways)! She said something to the effect of… “You don’t go to a plant and say, ‘Oh plant, this really isn’t a good time for me to water you. I really need to focus on watering myself,” or, “Plant, why can’t you help reassure me that I’m Beautiful?” or whatever nonsense (no offense meant, but it’s what I typed, so you heard it from the Source ). I loved the way she put it! And, oh how I love Nature, so it just clicked in my Head and Heart! You just water the other plant. You Just. Water. The. Plant. What if we thought about relationships as plants? “Oh plant, you seem like you need some time alone, so I’m gonna give you Space.” “Oh plant, you look a little droopy, let me give you some of my Light.” “Oh, this isn’t seeming to bloom fast enough!” Give it Time. “Oh plant, you look underfed…” Give it Nourishment. “Oh, this little bugger looks neglected!” Give it Love. What if it LITERALLY: Is. that simple. Why do they say to get a plant and keep it alive for six months prior to a relationship? You have to go through the motions to take care of yourself. You have to go through the motions of investment in self and worthiness of self-care. Perhaps taking care of a plant, another living thing which you cannot control but can influence its environment and way of life and chances for succeeding, teaches us the beauty of living outside of self. Outside of our needs. Outside of our wants. Outside of our desires and other such introspective appeals to the senses. Maybe maintaining a plant for six months is the exact same biorhythm needed, practically to the T*, needed to take Time away from our jobs, retire our fear, find the Space to replant and Grow, and trust that the Garden has got us until we got ourselves.

That, if we Shift to living in our Hearts, to think to care for the plant next to us and that they would be so inclined to return the favor if you show them the Way. We create our own realities. So if you want to see Love? Show Love. If you want to be Successful? Care for the Success of Others. If you want to Get Help, Give Help! The Universe feels these motions, these actions, and we MUST release the “Okayness” of inertia. One small action a day, one small kindness, one big smile, one release of selfish intent and refocus on other first, one compromise on belief, one positive step towards daily growth, and not only will we grow and blossom in beauty, but we will be surrounded by the Garden of other nourished plants that we helped fertile the ground for, before their roots, along their Path that leads them back to you… Completion of the Journey, and this, my folks, is the Garden of Eden. I pray this message finds you well and that you embrace the Possibilities of the essence of flowers, of plants, of Nature, and allow its lessons to take root in the very beat, rhythm, and Vibration of your Heart, Mind, Body, and Soul.

Oh, and I guess if I were to say what I currently guess is the message of the Bloom in one sentence: “Do not define a flower by the beauty of its bloom, but by the growth it took to get there.” Or something like that…

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And in closing, I write this phrase purposefully to stretch the societally negative reception of the positive phrase, “Blessed Be,” along with the instant/ needs to *Literally* be checked/ judgement of the aligned belief systems which hold this phrase. I urge anyone who has an emotionally negative reaction to the phrase, “Blessed Be” to instead take it as it is *literally* Intended (not as filtered through Programming): Blessed Be. May all be Blessed. Now there. That’s spiritual flexibility, right? It’s okay to say, “Blessed Be,” right? Is it good? Yes. Is it positive? Yes. Is it kind? Yes. Is it necessary? I’d say Blessings are always necessary. Oh, well then, sure, why not! BLESSED BE, Right?! Right on! This is how we should consider others belief systems, finding connections, searching for understanding and re-integration in our own systems in a way we find pleasing, and generally find similarities rather than empowering divisive, quick jerk, emotionally charged reactions without further introspection or questioning. Just stretching our mind a little here… it’s okay to be a little upset… we should be… think for yourself and find out why. Or not. Up to you.

Much love!